The Loves of My Life

The Loves of My Life

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Doing It.

So there I was....standing in my kitchen making dinner.

Not just any ole macaroni and cheese dinner.....but an actual meat & potatoes dinner with salad to boot! For those of you that know me....that doesn't happen often. 

But there I the kitchen. Paul had taken Riley out for a bike ride to a little beach near our house (yes- I know, life is hard) and Jeremiah was playing Roller Coaster Tycoon on the computer.

With excitement and sweet Riley comes bounding through the kitchen door with a huge smile on her face.

Paul follows her in...

"Mommy, Riley has something very exciting to tell you."

With the biggest smile on her face.....she shares that she just rode her bike for the first time without training wheels.

"I did it!" 

I gave her the biggest hug I could and smiled right back at I looked into her face I don't think I have ever seen her look so proud of herself.

It's taken her awhile to learn how to ride on a bike.....and I didn't even know that Paul was gonna have her try on their bike ride.  It was such a pleasant surprise.
Before Paul walked out of the kitchen he told me that as soon as she was done.....she got off her bike and jumped into his arms. (I'm weepy just remembering him tell me that).

What a beautiful moment. 
...and I missed it.

I was sad, but I was more proud than anything.

When Paul walked out of the kitchen, I couldn't hold back my tears and they slid down my face as I sliced up the tri-tip.

I was teary for many reasons......but mostly because as my daughter and husband walked out of the kitchen, where I was cooking a family dinner into the living room to share with Jeremiah the exciting news, I realized.......

 that I had done it.

that I was doing it.

I had fulfilled a dream that I wasn't sure imaginable......

I had created a family......a whole family.

Growing up with a dysfunctional family I had always wanted a daddy to teach me to ride my bike.
I wanted family dinners where we sat down and talked......or not talked.
I wanted to come home to a house where I knew my mom and dad would be celebrate with me on all occasions.

So I stood there in the kitchen with tears of joy and amazement. I am continually amazed that I have been given the blessing of a wonderful marriage and beautiful healthy children. 

I am amazed that I can give my children what I didn't have.....and it brings me so much joy.

Monday, April 13, 2009

Easter Re-Cap

So after I wrote my last blog I rode my bike down to 2nd street to pick up a gift card for my sisters birthday. The store wasn't open yet, so I decided to waste time by browsing in "The Children's Place".

Wrong Move.

They were having a big sale.

On their spring dresses.

and I have a gift card.

I walked around the store thinking about how cute my little
 Riley would look in that dress....or how handsome Jeremiah would be in that vest. 

Luckily, I didn't get too caught up in the moment. Some how I snapped myself out of it....and walked out of the store empty handed.

It's all so easy. I realize my last blog could read a  bit scathing towards others' Easter traditions.....but I needed it. I easily can be distracted. I was glad I wrote that blog though...because I put my conviction out there for others to see. I knew if I showed up on Sunday in brand new outfits with my kids toting their new baskets- I would be put into check by my friends  (at least I hope my girls would keep me in check) AND my husband. 
And mostly...I would be missing the point.

Easter was wonderful this year. I spent time at the breakfast table sharing with the kids why we weren't doing baskets this year......and they were so okay with it. (in fact one didn't even notice they were missing). We spent time talking about what Easter means and why it's so important to us as Christians. 

I didn't worry about what they wore, (okay...not true....Miah got dressed in play clothes and I told him to go change into a nice shirt), and I didn't think about the perfect Family Easter picture. I just enjoyed the morning, sang kid praise songs with the kids on the way to church....
and loved being with my "family" while praising God for his sacrifice.

And even when I saw all the beautiful Easter outfits...especially this one, I didn't sigh. 
I recognized it's my conviction and I was happy with the decision I made.

On another was quite the busy week. Jeremiah turned 8, the Angels had opening day and Wes turned 7 weeks old.
Here's a few pics to recap the week.

Opening Day of the Angels Game. 
We didn't make it to the game, but we dressed in our attire and
  drank RED juice for dinner in  honor of the halos.

Special moment

Miah's birthday breakfast.

Wes giving me the business.

Thursday, April 9, 2009

I'm Not Buying Into it

This past Sunday I sat down at our table to enjoy some breakfast and the Sunday Paper before starting the whirlwind of getting ready for church. My favorite part of Sunday's paper is ....don't laugh......the Target Circular.  Yep...ever since I was a teenager I have been opening the paper to find my slice of shopper heaven. I love to peruse the circular for good sales and any "must need" (read "must want") items.

This past Sunday was no different. I opened the paper to find Target's Easter edition  circular.

I smiled as I glanced at the front page....the spring colors make me so happy. But as I continued turning the smile turned to a grimace and I quietly began cursing consumerism.  Every page was filled with all kind of sales enticing the buyers to get the perfect Easter gift or Easter outfit  for their child.

Since when did Easter become Christmas?

I'm sure it has slowly happened over time....but the marketing for Easter is turning into another   "Buy me and forget what the holiday is really about" event.

It makes my stomach turn- even though  I had already bought the kids their Easter things (they need those sand toys- REALLY! They did), I can't believe  how much we,Or maybe I should say....I can't believe how much I have bought into the idea that we need to get gifts and the perfect outfit for Easter.  

We are losing the meaning of Easter.  As it is, Easter is second rate to Christmas......and it shouldn't be. Easter is the reason why I go to church every's the reason why I continue to love others and basically...the reason why I get up in the morning.

Someone freakin' died for me....and then....he became alive 3 days later. He beat that I can live with him for eternity. He didn't bring me chocolates.....he brought me his body and blood. He didn't wear a chiffon dress or a 3 piece suit.....but a rag, a simple cloth to cover the niceties.
His gift was life.......and I can't buy that in any Target circular.

So yes- I have been on a high horse this week. 
I am refusing to buy my kids Easter outfits for church. They have plenty of clothes. 
I am refusing to make a basket for them. They get plenty of candy every other day as well as baskets from grandparents.
I am refusing to buy them toys- (although, I already bought the sand toys......)
I am refusing to buy into all this Easter stuff.'s cute and it's fun and I'm sure on Sunday when I see all the pretty dresses and suits I will sigh and wish I would have gotten the kids something new, but I think it will help me to remember.......
it will help me to remember why I am not buying into the American Easter.....

It will help me remember the Resurrection.